Friday 16 August 2013

How to Develop Self Esteem

Work on Improving Yourself

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    Dress nicely. No one is more conscious of your physical appearance than you are. When you don't look good, it changes the way you carry yourself and interact with other people. This doesn't mean you need to spend a lot on clothes. One great rule to follow is “spend twice as much, buy half as much”. Rather than buying a bunch of cheap clothes, buy half as many select, high quality items. Expensive clothes wear out less easily and stay in style longer than cheap clothes. Find things that you like and in return, you will like the way you look.
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    Have good hygiene. Take care of your personal appearance. In most cases, significant improvements can be made by bathing and shaving frequently, wearing clean clothes and brushing your teeth twice a day.
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    Practice good posture. People with slumped shoulders and lethargic movements display a lack of self confidence. They often are unenthusiastic and don't consider themselves important. By practicing good posture, you’ll automatically feel more confident. Stand up straight, keep your head up, and make eye contact. You'll make a positive impression on others and instantly feel more alert and empowered.
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    Work out regularly. Physical fitness has a huge effect on self confidence. If you’re out of shape, you’ll feel insecure and unattractive. By working out, you improve your physical appearance and do something constructive with your time. If you work out in the morning, it also creates positive momentum that you can build on the rest of the day.
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    Give back to others. Volunteer someplace in your community. If you stop thinking about yourself and concentrate on the contribution you’re making to the rest of the world, you won’t worry as much about you own flaws. This will increase your self esteem.

Make Yourself Stand Out

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    Compliment other people. Break the cycle of negativity by getting in the habit of praising other people. In the process, you’ll become well liked and build self confidence. By looking for the best in others, you indirectly bring out the best in yourself.
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    Sit in the front row. Most people prefer the back of a classroom or office because they’re afraid of being noticed. This reflects a lack of self confidence. By deciding to sit in the front row, you can get over this irrational fear and build your self confidence. You’ll also be more visible to the important people talking from the front of the room.
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    Speak up. Many people never speak up because they’re afraid that people will judge them or think of them negatively. The simple fact is that these are fears everyone experiences. By making an effort to speak up at least once in every group discussion, you’ll become a better public speaker, more confident in your own thoughts and recognized as a leader by your peers.
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    Walk faster. You don't have to power walk at all times, but people with confidence walk quickly. They have places to go and things to do. Even if you aren’t in a hurry, you can increase your self confidence by doing this because you will look and feel more important.

Remove Your Negative Self-Esteem

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    Start from within. Ignore any and all destructive criticism or insults, including any from your past. Your opinion of yourself is the most important opinion of all, because you know yourself better than anyone else. Many of us have been hurt by others at some time. It is crucial not to internalize that abuse and let them continue to hurt us, because that means the other person wins. If we let go of the past, ignore hurtful negativity and make ourselves happy, then we win.
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    Create daily affirmations. Tell yourself that you are a wonderful person who deserves to be happy. Make a list of all the things you like about yourself. If you've made mistakes that prevent you from believing that you deserve to be happy, take measures to relieve that guilt. Apologize to people you may have hurt (if possible), learn from those mistakes and forgive yourself.
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    Start with small steps to gain confidence. Take small steps and make small choices to gain confidence in your ability to make a decision. As you become secure in your ability to make good choices, you will gain confidence in yourself, and be more secure about your abilities in general.
    • For example, if purchasing jeans makes you anxious because of the plethora of brands, colors, and styles, then just go with your instincts. Trust yourself and go with whatever feels right to you. And if you really feel you made a wrong decision in retrospect, the situation can be easily rectified by exchanging the jeans.
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    Don't always try to please others. It is great to be considerate of others, but think before sacrificing your own needs to please them. Bending over backwards for strangers, mere acquaintances or people you don't trust may leave you with the short end of the stick. In short, don't allow yourself to be used.
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    Be your own person. Don't try to copy anyone else. You will be at your best when you are being yourself because of your uniqueness. Strive to be your best and do not criticize yourself if you fall short of your expectations.
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    Avoid negative people. People who have a negative attitude which may rub off on you are not good for you. If you're timid, loud and aggressive people are probably not good for you, and vice versa. Whatever you do, do not compare yourself to others. Just be the best that you can be.
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    Face your fears and learn from your failures. We only fail when we do not make the best out of adversity. When something doesn't go the way we would like it to, there is something to be learned from that, which can be applied next time you are in a similar situation. Get up and try again.
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    Stop the negative thoughts. Try positive thinking on for size. The term “self-fulfilling prophecy” in relation to self-esteem basically states that whatever you believe about yourself, whether it be perfect or totally off base, becomes true. If you constantly tell yourself you are stupid or that you will never achieve success, you will in turn act as such. When negative thoughts come into your mind, speak to them. Say "Stop" or "No," and instantly replace that negative thought with a positive one. Using this method will help you to break the habit of repeatedly giving yourself negative messages. Instead, make a habit out of saying positive things about yourself and to yourself, and use the self-fulfilling prophecy to your advantage.
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    Don't worry about being "perfect." Aiming for perfection in life is a lost cause because the term means different things to different people. Nobody is perfect in the eyes of everyone else. Instead, seek to achieve goals.
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    Learn to appreciate yourself. Everyone has strengths, weaknesses, habits, and principles that define who you are and can make you distinctive. Spend more time focusing on the qualities about yourself that you like and less on the ones that you dislike. You can better accomplish this by taking up hobbies and projects that you can do which will make use of your strengths. Additionally, by starting on some projects that emphasize your good traits, it will keep you busy so you will end up spending less time thinking about your weaknesses.
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    Reward yourself when you succeed. Treat yourself to something nice. Bask in the glow of your successes. Believe in yourself completely and others will also believe and trust in you.
 http://www.wikihow.com/Develop-Self-Esteem

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