As you think, you shall become...,

The Magic of Thinking Big is the first book I ever read to do with aiming high, organising your life and living purposefully, and it is a testemant to the quality of the book that my copy is now an incomprehensible mess of highlighted passages, scribbled notes and scrawled realisations. I have read and re-read it many times and have committed it's principles to memory. Cliched as it is, I can say this book has changed my life immeasurably.

How to Actually Keep Your New Years Resolution

By Dr. Jeff Godin Ph.D., CSCS, CISSN and Tammy Godin, B.A.B. Seventy-eight percent of people fail at achieving their New Year’s resolution. Why? Is it because their goals are too lofty and will-power is crushed? Maybe they are in the contemplation stage of making a habit change and don’t know how to prepare and take action. Or is it because they are focused on the negative and not the positive aspects of their goal? Is it because they are extrinsically motivated, not intrinsically motivated, and when results don’t happen overnight they get frustrated?.
Some common New Year’s resolutions are, “I am going to lose weight,” “I am going to exercise more,” “I am going to learn a new language.” Regardless of the resolution, the key is to develop a SOLID PLAN.
Start by asking yourself the following questions:
1. What is my resolution?
2. What is holding me back now?
3. How will I accomplish my resolution?
4. How will I know when I get there, what are the acceptance criteria?

3 Simple Sure-fire Tips to Make 2013 Your Best Year Yet

Learn HERE how to make this your Best Year Yet, starting any day!

These tips may seem so simple, so ordinary that your first response may be to say something like  "Get real, tell me something ground-breaking and Earth-shattering that's really going to make a difference!"

And then when I tell you that each of these three tips has been backed by neuroscience research to show that they make a positive difference to how your brain works, and lead to improvements in happiness, self esteem and confidence you may still not believe that they can really make a difference. We do not have time or space here to go over the research but if you are interested go to the PraxisNow web site and look at the posts of Mark Waldman whose work I freely acknowledge as the inspiration for this post.

So what are these three tips?

What Did I Do Well This Year?

Give yourself credit.

I guess that like most people you did not achieve all your goals, hit all your targets or keep all your New Year Resolutions in 2012

If you did, well that's fantastic, well done and you are well on course to create the life of your dreams!

But if, like most of the human race you missed some of the goals, did not shed those pounds or kilos you wanted to say goodbye to, and the attendance at the gym petered out after a week or so, or whatever, do not give yourself a hard time but be grateful for the learning.  Now, take a pen and paper and WRITE DOWN, yes actually put on record in your own handwriting, what you did manage to do, whether it was on your original list or not.

For example:

You got up and went to work, more days than not, even if you felt like pulling the covers over your jead, or

You made those job applications, filled out the CV and answeredthe advertisemnts even though at the time you felt disheartened, or

You helped that parent struggling with the pushchair up the steps of the subway, or

You remembered your Mum's birthday, or anyone's special day and send a message or called them to say "hi" or.... you get the idea.

If you did this, actually wrote out some of your positive achievements, no matter how tiny they may seem,  over the past year I guarantee you will be feeling better about yourself and more confident.

If you have NOT done it yet, do so straight away and either way, write a comment below about the effect.

Tomorrow I will share a sure-fire way to continue this process and make 2013 your best year ever!

Much love and happiness form David.

Great Oaks from Little Acorns Grow

At this time of year many people think of New Year Resolutions, while reviewing the past year and setting goals for the year ahead.  How big to make those goals: Massive, grandiose goals which will require faith and determination to succeed, or tiny baby steps which seem almost insignificant in comparison?

Many  "Gurus" and motivational speakers will have you go for the former.  "Make them outrageous, reach for the stars and Think Big" they exhort.  "Get out of your comfort zone and dare to dream. If the goal doesn't scare you it's not big enough!"

I wonder how many people make those big, extravagant goals and end up carrying them forward year after year, saying "This Year I will definitely make it!  This year I will have the faith, the drive, the enthusiasm to write the book, launch the million dollar product, quit the job, start the speaking tour...etc,"  You get the idea

Every goal that is not met not only saps your confidence, but sends a message to you unconscious mind "These goals are not for real, they are just daydreams!"  Every year, every underachieved goal, every failed esolution, the same message of failure.  Surely there must be a better way to set and achieve goals, to set and keep resolutions?

We have already reviewed "The Compound Effect" by Darren Hardy.  To remind you, or in case you have not heard of it, he iterates the principle that Tiny changes, repeated consistently over time, produce massive effects.

You have probably heard the saying that "most people greatly overestimate what they can achieve in a year, but greatly underestimate what they can achieve in five years."

Now of all times it is good to remember this sage advice.  Do yourself a favour.  If you have not read The Compound Effect, do so now, and it is a must read for anybody even thinking about making a New Year Resolution.

Coffee - A Little Story to Start your Day!

You will never look at a cup of coffee the same way again.

A young woman went to her mother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling. It seemed as one problem was solved, a new one arose.

Her mother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire soon the pots came to boil. In the first she placed carrots, in the second she placed eggs, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans. She let them sit and boil; without saying a word

In about twenty minutes she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl.

Then she ladled the co ffee out and placed it in a bowl. Turning to her daughter, she asked, 'Tell me what you see.'

'Carrots, eggs, and coffee,' she replied.

Her mother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. The mother then asked the daughter to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard boiled egg.

Finally, the mother asked the daughter to sip the coffee. The daughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma the daughter then asked, 'What does it mean, mother?'

Her mother explained that each of these objects had faced the same adversity: boiling water. Each reacted differently. The carrot went in strong, hard, and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it softened and became weak. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior, but after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened. The ground coff ee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.

'Which are you?' she asked her daughter. 'When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

Think of this: Which am I? Am I the carrot that seems strong, but with pain and adversity do I wilt and become soft and lose my strength?

Am I the egg that starts with a malleable heart, but changes with the heat? Did I have a fluid spirit, but after a death, a breakup, a financial hardship or some other trial, have I become hardened and stiff? Does my shell look the same, but on the inside am I bitter and tough with a stiff spirit and hardened heart?

Or am I like the coffee bean? The bean actually changes the hot water, the very circumstance that brings the pain. When the water gets hot, it releases the fragrance and flavor. If you are like the bean, when things are at their worst, you get better and change the situ ation around you.

When the hour is the darkest and trials are their greatest, do you elevate yourself to another level? How do you handle adversity? Are you a carrot, an egg or a coffee bean?

May we all be COFFEE?


Thanks to my Dear Friend Olimpia Pop for this story.

3 Simple Tools to Boost Your Confidence

Confidence is something we would all like a little more of from time to time. Even the most confident people can feel out of their depth in some situations. If you are anything like me then you probably find yourself confident in most familiar situations, but perhaps get a little nervous when you are put into a new situation…or at least that is how I used to feel
This article is going to show you 3 simple and quick tools / methods you can use to boost your confidence. All of these things are quick boosts that you can do to help boost your confidence when you need it, and the more you use them the stronger your confidence will get in the long term, too.